I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Randomize
