winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
