I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
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