We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
i've created a new STD.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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