just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
