The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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