Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Randomize
