you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Randomize
