don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
40s are totally the cure
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
