At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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