oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize
