I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Randomize
