Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
