And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Randomize