Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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