just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
