I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
