Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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