Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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