seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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