wat bout pragnant strippers??
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize