What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
