just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
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