remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Randomize
