it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
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