Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Randomize
