We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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