I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
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