i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
love makes seman taste better
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
