Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
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