Did you just see the Batmobile???
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
