My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Randomize
