Pants 0. Shit 1.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
My cat gives me a boner
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Randomize
