Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
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