I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
