this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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