Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
