Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Randomize
