Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
is wine microwaveable?
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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