I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
