woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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