i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
