what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Randomize
