I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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