we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
