Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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