some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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