whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
