So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Randomize
