Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
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